I was talking about it on a call a year ago; it makes sense that you are going to be drawn to the eye of somebody who, I don’t know, the whole idea, it all makes sense now.”
“I don’t know that I was ever consciously drawing his eye, but yeah—he had something like an eye, but you know what—that eye was a big part of what I was trying to do,” he says. “I was always in the middle of, like, my mouth, my mouth to the side of the eye, a lot of the time I was leaning on that eye. I’m not sure, but I think maybe I actually drew the mouth of him I was drawing. It’s just that I was trying to figure out the right eye type and that kind of stuff. It was sort of a funny, odd thing, not really knowing—I was just doing stuff.”
When I ask about the sketch of the Eye that he made for the cover of his record, his mind goes somewhere else.
“I don’t remember—maybe a sketch of a tree when I was younger, but that’s not what the Eye was,” he said. “The Eye was in the background, the main thing—you know, what the eye looks like.”
“My mind gets very strange things,” he continues. “I’ve always been a storyteller.” He says he has lived with an overwhelming level of self-doubt and dread since he was young, but he also says he has become a person with no real boundaries.
“A little bit of self-doubt comes up, and now I’ve really got to accept that I’m not the greatest person ever,” he says, sounding slightly defeated. “I can only say I’m a very great person to be around and a very good parent. So now, for the most part—I can live my life as good as people would want me to live my life. A lot of my life’s been pretty bad, that’s my fault, but life’s not really going my way. It’s my own fault.”
As he says this, his voice tightens a bit.
“It sucks,” he insists. “I’m a great person to have around—I’m a good parent and I’m a great friend. I’ve lived the most difficult life of anyone on the planet. I’ve lived my life well. It sucks some—there have been some good times
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